I’ve heard the saying “The heart is a lonely hunter.” It means your heart will draw you to relationships good or bad out of its need to be connected. I have been a Christian for more than a few decades. I have been single, married, then single again. I have read all the Christian singles books. I led Bible studies on being single. But somehow I still find my heart trying to take me down roads I should never travel as a believer in Christ.
The Bible tells us,
Jeremiah 17:9
New Living Translation (NLT)
9 “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?
But somehow I still buy into what our society says-that my heart can be trusted and romantic feelings should be pursued. I have confused the Biblical view of love and romance with the world’s view as represented in books and movies and TV. Thankfully, I have lived a disciplined life as a Christian for long enough that I have learned to only act according to what the Holy Spirit directs me in my life. So I don’t let my feelings control my actions and I barely let them know that they are the object of my affection.
I am still left with my heart- the hunter and the feelings it gives me trying desperately to connect me. I find myself feeling emotional connections with people who neither know the Lord nor share my values or the worst of all- that do know the Lord but don’t live a godly life. My heart tells me that they will change. It tells me that God brought me in their life to help them find their way. So I guard my romantic feelings as I allow friendship with strong boundaries only.
Then I wait for a sign from God like Diane Lane’s character in Under the Tuscan Sun, when the bird left his droppings on her head so the Senora knew she was the one who should buy the villa. I wait for a sign that this man will become the godly person that I need for my life. But more times than I can count the only sign that comes is the revelation of a fatal flaw-a character flaw, an addiction, a worldliness that doesn’t line up with a life sold out for Christ. Once again I have let my heart muddle my thinking and I have put hope in my feelings and not in the only One that deserves my trust, my Lord and Savior.
I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks because I think I have a new attitude and a new approach. From now on I will make sure that I let the Holy Spirit draw me to those who are sold out for Christ and not listen to my deceitful heart. Why does this sound familiar?
cindybiondigobrecht 
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